After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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