have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila