WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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