I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.