You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Randomize
