I wish i was in the wii world.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
