Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize