I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
im calling her cock vulture from now on
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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