you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.