i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Randomize