apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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