sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Randomize