she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.