theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
my sisters under your porch take her home
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize