It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize