I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.