Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
29 Super Simple DIY Drinking Games
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
29 People Who Do Dirty Things Just To Get Their Way
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑