So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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