He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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