Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
