one might say we're banned from that church
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...