She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
27 Times The Kardashian-Jenner Clan Absolutely Slayed at NYFW
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
These tits shall not be calmed