You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.