I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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