I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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