It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
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puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
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He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.