Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
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You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
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My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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