Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Guys Hate When Girls Do These 29 Cringeworthy Things
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked