We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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