mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
