i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize