Texts From Last Night

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  (360): View more from Washington

  Let's get naked and see who's stronger.

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  (360): Let's get naked and see who's stronger. http://tfl.nu/4286
  Replies (8) Good night (1651) Bad night (406) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.

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  (978): I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it. http://tfl.nu/p2ch
  Replies (4) Good night (2588) Bad night (436) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.

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  (314): My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work. http://tfl.nu/vmme
  Replies (15) Good night (982) Bad night (3333) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.

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  (330): hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival. http://tfl.nu/kgpd
  Replies (9) Good night (4377) Bad night (629) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle

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  (904): nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle http://tfl.nu/jw9o
  Replies (55) Good night (5167) Bad night (1315) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.

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  (847): woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score. http://tfl.nu/p406
  Replies (26) Good night (9100) Bad night (658)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.

  (1-860): View more from Connecticut

  He just wants an even tan

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  (860): I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked. (1-860): He just wants an even tan http://tfl.nu/akk9
  Replies (18) Good night (4070) Bad night (1014) Order T-Shirt
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.

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  (802): Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle. http://tfl.nu/jhbj
  Replies (7) Good night (2902) Bad night (1395) Order T-Shirt
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  He's yummy.

  (613): View more from Ontario

  HE'S GAY. AND 40.

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Irrelevant.

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  (802): He's yummy. (613): HE'S GAY. AND 40. (802): Irrelevant. http://tfl.nu/3zsj
  Replies (9) Good night (2019) Bad night (836)
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  (914): View more from New York

  I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.

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  (914): I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me. http://tfl.nu/7a7a
  Replies (5) Good night (1394) Bad night (1475) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.

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  (404): Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets. http://tfl.nu/bkpk
  Replies (7) Good night (1415) Bad night (333) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".

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  (916): Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles". http://tfl.nu/t7tu
  Replies (4) Good night (906) Bad night (462) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you

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  (916): BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you http://tfl.nu/atej
  Replies (1) Good night (781) Bad night (184) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."

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  (401): I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks." http://tfl.nu/iwi5
  Replies (6) Good night (907) Bad night (109)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about

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  (781): I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about http://tfl.nu/ocbn
  Replies (4) Good night (263) Bad night (505)

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