I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Randomize
