I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
did i just pee glitter
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize