Dude you don't even follow my twitter
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
My penis needs a shock collar
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me