I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
