Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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