Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's not a foreskin expert like you
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.