Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow