I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize