yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
