walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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