It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
