if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.