My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
