Texts From Last Night

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  (949): View more from California

  Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that

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  (949): Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that http://tfl.nu/44ly
  Replies (35) Good night (630) Bad night (5416) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.

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  (419): The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song. http://tfl.nu/rv8e
  Replies (38) Good night (8929) Bad night (1124) Order T-Shirt
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved

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  (613): you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved http://tfl.nu/t5ge
  Replies (33) Good night (7996) Bad night (931) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.

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  (419): her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier. http://tfl.nu/ogdc
  Replies (88) Good night (7252) Bad night (1233) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you

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  (419): you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you http://tfl.nu/zo5g
  Replies (7) Good night (3893) Bad night (1076)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.

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  (405): I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible. http://tfl.nu/59e7
  Replies (19) Good night (762) Bad night (3563) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.

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  (570): I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless. http://tfl.nu/rrlk
  Replies (6) Good night (3806) Bad night (608) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.

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  (913): Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move. http://tfl.nu/e9ea
  Replies (6) Good night (4623) Bad night (759) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.

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  (970): I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting. http://tfl.nu/e4bo
  Replies (11) Good night (792) Bad night (2375) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies

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  (248): we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies http://tfl.nu/8d5i
  Replies (10) Good night (1738) Bad night (769)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass

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  (845): I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass http://tfl.nu/26l8
  Replies (8) Good night (1755) Bad night (530) Order T-Shirt
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...

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  (843): he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house... http://tfl.nu/3q6f
  Replies (6) Good night (1842) Bad night (430) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.

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  (516): Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend. http://tfl.nu/jc2j
  Replies (15) Good night (1180) Bad night (508) Order T-Shirt
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.

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  (319): I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester. http://tfl.nu/qs45
  Replies (10) Good night (722) Bad night (302) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock

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  (850): She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock http://tfl.nu/s796
  Replies (8) Good night (678) Bad night (1586)

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