U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old