the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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