somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..