We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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