So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Quick, to the slutcave!
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
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